The Knowing

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Brede walked up the old game trail again on a brisk fall morning before the sun broke the low range to the east. Day after day, always on the sly, he found a reason to walk up into the foothills and slip away for a few minutes or hours. It was easy, with so much fence to mend. No one missed him back at the house, and no one offered to take his job so far across the pasture and hayfields. Really, right up to the edge of the forest.

He paused as he came into the clearing in front of the weathered stone that he had come to gaze at for the past three weeks. No one had ever accompanied him to visit this awkwardly carved statue, worn by rain and covered with lichen, no matter how he pleaded. Once his son had come as far as the head of the trail, but then had turned away as if he had forgotten why he was there. When Brede asked him why, he had no recollection of the aborted hike.

Today was different. Three people stood around it in waist-high grass and dried goldenrod, stood there like they were waiting for him. Somehow, he wasn’t surprised. Somehow he knew no one else would be coming.

They were all known to each other, though he couldn’t recall ever having a conversation with any of them beyond polite greetings in town. Maybe they knew each other better. Young Lihr should have been a surprise, but having no expectations, he just registered the child’s presence with the same dispassion.

“I’m Brede,” he said. Since he was the last to get there, it felt right to go first.

Vanesha nodded. He knew her name was Vanesha before she spoke, but she confirmed it, and then Lihr and Rodden took their turns. Rodden asked first. “How long have you known?”

Brede shrugged. “Three weeks. I’ve been coming here every day since. Don’t really know why, though.” He trailed off at the end, turned to look at the statue again, and wondered for the twenty-first time what it might be made of. “How about you?”

Rodden was also looking at the statue. “I’ve known for a year. Today, I found a trail,” he turned to his right, behind the statue and gestured. “Over there.” He turned back, looked at them. “It led me here.”

Instinctively they all turned to see where he pointed, but no one could see an opening. Brede just accepted it and nodded. “How about you, Lihr? When did you know?”

“Two days ago.” Lihr swallowed. “I was leaving school. I heard a bell, like the church bell in Belzen Hollow, but you can’t hear that all the way up here. I was about to go down the steps, and I heard it. And I stopped to hear it better. I even asked Jemm, my friend Jemm, if he could hear that bell. And he said, ‘What bell?’ but didn’t even stop. So I just listened for a minute then… Then everything seemed to make sense. Stuff I didn’t understand before, stuff I heard before and didn’t understand, then it kind of seemed obvious, like I already knew it. I didn’t tell anyone. I got some answers wrong on purpose today because I thought if I answered everything right, then my teacher would know, and the other kids would know. So I lied and said some wrong stuff.” Lihr stopped abruptly and hunched his shoulders.

Vanesha smiled and nodded. “Thank you, Lihr. Thank you for that. You were brave. And you know you can tell us, right? Anything.” The others agreed with murmurs, but no one moved to get closer. 

“I was fixing a post, I had the sledge resting on the top, I was ready to drive it in, you know? For me, it was an owl hooting. It just hooted once, and I thought, ‘How strange, this late in the morning,’ but it was unmistakable. The next I knew, it was after noon, and the sun was going west. I guess I just stood there with the hammer resting on the post. I was alone, I don’t think anyone saw it.” Brede shifted his weight and thought about drawing in together a bit more, but it didn’t feel like that kind of meeting.

He realized Vanesha was crying softly. “My mom died,” she said. “And I felt it even though I wasn’t with her. I felt the knowing pass from her to me. She was one of The Anointed, and I thought…” she sniffled, caught her breath. “I thought she was crazy. A religious fanatic.” She looked up, but everyone was nodding, giving her a tight smile. Even Lihr, mouth open slightly in surprise, looked at her with wide eyes. She laughed a bit, “I’m not going that route myself, I don’t know what I think about The Anointed, but I’m pretty sure that’s not me. I do wonder, though. Why it came to me, right when she died.” She wiped her eyes.

Brede had seen her dozens of times over the years without ever really seeing her. But knowing made a difference, somehow. He felt the ghost of a comforting embrace in his arms and on his chest, but he remained rooted to the spot. He didn’t want to give the wrong impression, and this meeting was almost over.

“I’ve got to get back,” Rodden said, gesturing again toward the path that only he seemed to see.

“My mom doesn’t know where I am,” Lihr said. 

“See you in a week?” Vanesha asked, her voice rising slightly.

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Brede said.

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