Episode 37: Lunapalooza on the Moon! Report

General Summary

Ecliptic Boogaloo

Lunapalooza 2 Ecliptic Boogaloo occurs on Sarch na Thaya in the elven palace built into the tree Lokorn.

The crew scopes it out and sets it up. Cabron Elf-King teleports up for the party, Aymer is there as well as many of the rabbitfolk, vampires, elves, three dragons, and Dillothel Heskiloth.

Human suit Bazzunath is telepathically amplifying subliminal beats, and the party is rocking. DJ Lance Uppercut and MC Artificery are prisming out the jams, Nia is singing, and El dances with Aymer.

General Aginnad's Gambit

Suddenly, the crew is pulled offstage, teleported into a strange Astral prison where Aginnad begins some speech about revenge against Lance until he glitches on repeat mid-growl making a fairly nice hook for a future song.

A familiar feminine voice cries out, "I can't hold him for long, get out!" While one of the prison doors flies open. The crew rushes down into a trio of Abishai who tried fear, magic and might against the crew, but we're absolutely unprepared for the radiant rage erupting from Aymer, "BITCH! I WAS AT A PARTY!"

The red leader of the devils, who bore a full key ring, saw his warriors falling and tried to turn the tide by forcing his will on Wicked Mind, "Obey the Five-Headed Mother!" He failed to sway El's mount. With his last gambit spent, the abishai treid to flee, but El's spell glaive prevented his flight. Completely overwhelmed, the demon groveled and begged how he could serve ones so powerful, El tossed out that he could commit suicide. The abishai exploded himself in an eruption of flames as everyone nearby dove for cover.

The key ring luckily survived the blast, and Spark quickly deduced the right keys for the doors. The crew decided to go back and confront Aginnad, but the captain had a scheme. She transformed herself into the red Abishai and walked into the central hall with the Pit Fiend Baron and with a single spell brought him under her charms. "Now," she announced to her new captive and the crew, "back to the party!"

Aginnad put up minor resistance, "but my revenge against Lanzo..."

Nia reassured him, "You will have your chance of revenge, not with violence, but by striking at the thing Lance cares most about, sick beats!"

DJ Battle For the Tri-Moon Wish

A teleport circle opens back up and the crew leaps back onto the Lunapalooza stage, Spark sending a bass drop through Bazzanuth to pick up where the music had faltered. The crowd roared both in exultation and then in fear as a pit fiend followed the crew, but Lance kept the music spinning.

Nia announced a musical duel and Spark shoved the thunderprism mic in front of the Hell Baron. Aginnad unleashed an unholy jam of screeching and growling detailing the absolutely obliteration of Lance's dreams and ambitions which sounded absolutely amazing.

The concert goers and crew were awestruck, Spark made some lewd comments regarding how much better his music was than his drinking, and the crowd turned expectantly to hear Lance's diss track.

Lance looked at Spark who started spinning a remix of their original Menelost Telperion hook. Lance began a transcendent track path through every musical genre he had gathered. He began with the folksy tunes of Nia's Tourney Train over the up beats of Tower Town. He dropped in the low reverberating drums of Razun, mixing in the hybrid beats of the Eladriel's Orchard of Industry and the whispering haunting chimes heard near Valentine's Flag. Finally he mashed up tribal beats from the bars of Ta-Arma, the Lapin Shard, Goblin Town, and his shifter crewmates.

The music finally converged back into the harmonious chants of the elves heard back that first day Lance laid eyes on Thaya's silver tree. Lance then stepped out from behind the DJ booth, abs glistening, mouth open, halo blazing. He raised his voice into and above the remixed elven chorus. In that moment, his voice pierced the heavens, the moons, Erathia and sun aligned, his halo merged with the solar corona unveiled by the eclipse and his music became gospel.

The magic of that moment flowed and triple moon beams flared down like a lance as he finished his song. A hush fell over the crowd, as the overwhelming awe of the divine spread sublimity. Baron Aginnad himself had fallen silent. His massive face was slack in rapt attention. Then, momentarily, sharp in recalcitrance before fading into crestfallen defeat.

Lance looked upon his beaten opposition, felt the magic filled to bursting in his soul, and remembered the demon's glorious track from earlier. He lifted the hex mic to his lips and locked eyes with Malfador's general. "I just wish we could truly be friends."

The pit fiend kept his gaze on the aasimar and rose to his full height, his wings opened up as wide as possible as he reached his massive hands down around Lance. He hoisted him high in the air like a trophy he had just earned and roared, "YES!"

The crowd screamed in a frenzy of support. The music started back up, and Nia began a rendition of 'Why can't we be friends?'

Lola Carly appeared next to the stage sputtering about how hard it was to hold Aginnad still so the party could escape. She then took in the scene before her. Her eyes darkened briefly in her mysterious way as she looked through the beyond. When her focus came back, she walked up to Lance and gave him a pinch on the cheek. "I think you use very good wish, honey."

Lunar Finale

The party continued with more music and drinking and games. Aginnad bared his soul to the party, he mentions he had kidnapped Lance because he knew the eclipse would give him enough magic to make a wish. Aginnad wanted to put a seed of Darkness into Lance so that he would be Aginnad's evil friend. Then he could use him to open a permanent gate to the hells. He mentions that it's hard being Malfador's son. He felt that Lance would truly understand him, and gave the crew a pit fiend spine to summon him. Though doing so might reveal his treachery to Malfador.

The party continued into the small hours of the night. Nia and Cabron had their own afterparty and invited Elenwe. Spark, Lance and Aginnad made not so secret plans to become a musical trio with Aginnad's artist name still in discussion.

The moons alignment gave magic to the Wood of Telperion and the Thayan Armada began their long trek back to Erathia.

Several rabbitfolk recruits to the Blackjack Traveling Troupe filled the cabins while it thrummed with potential as the newly installed (and verified) reliquary drive was hyper charged by the rare celestial alignment of all its connected planetoids.

Spark grabbed the controls, and, though they can now travel anywhere among the moons whenever they want, he started the crew back toward the Zone to face the waiting charges of their malfeasance regards the Hell Week accords.

Elenwe stumbled into her cabin drunk, tired and ready to sleep only to notice a tiny bassinet in the corner filled with a lovely elven baby who smelled her, and promptly began to wail and shit itself. In the ship corridor, Spark was walking with Way back to the engine room to show off the reliquary drive but stopped at the doorway long enough to chuckle and offer 'good luck!'.