LIMINALITY by Moony1 | World Anvil Manuscripts | World Anvil

Chapter 16

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"Janus..."

A familiar voice echoed throughout the blank space of darkness as Janus lay on nothing but the noexistent ground beneath him, floating seemingly in the endless nothingness that he found himself in, having lost all feeling from everything from the moment his consciousness became severed from his own body.

He remembers the sensation of his own essence, the warmth that held him in place, the gentle touch that was almost impossible for him to comprehend in its true nature, and the bright light that shone in front of his own eyes when he was still alive.

There was nothing left other than his uttered lack of thoughts in his own mind, as he can only drift through the darkness with constant silence and blindness as the complete void of everything has become his sight, being utterly deprived of it.

However, for a moment, Janus is forgetting something important; it feels to him as if this place where he resided within the darkness is starting to feel familiar, telling him to do something about it, even though there is nothing for him to do here.

"Janus..."

Who's calling him? He thought that after hearing that voice again, he couldn't wrap his finger around who's speaking to him; his memory is absent from the only familiar thing he can perceive or sense, like nothingness that surrounded him.

And then it called his name again and again and again, growing more desperate every time he failed to respond back to the mysterious source that was barely a whisper in the wind, telling him that this place isn't the place where he belongs.

For what felt like hours, the voice stopped, allowing him a brief clarification of silence, of nothingness, and of everything that isn't the same. All different, yet all the same, a paradox in his mind that is simply nonsense as he wished to continue floating again, trying to dream of a place he can belong to in this vast abyss of nothing.

But the voice came back again, although different and far more clear than the last time, which made him realize that the voice, or rather someone who is speaking to him, is not unknown and was not in his imagination. It was a person he recognized.

"JANUS!"

Just like that, memories immediately flashed before his eyes leading up to his fight with Cthulhu; images poured into his mind as if it were a broken faucet, mercilessly drenching his conscious state as he recalled every single detail that happened ever since he was brought to the dreamlands.

Opening his eyes with one swift move, he saw the rising sun with its radiant rays lighting the skies along with its crimson red and yellow glow that warmed his cold body. All while he still remained in the same obvious position as before, laying on the ground with his back while a disgruntled white cat looked over him, its paw resting on the god's shoulder.

Staring into its reflective, blue eyes, it appeared to be frowning with its curled-up whiskers, looking visibly unhappy to see him again. "What took you so long?" Schrodinger grumbled, having tried to snap him out of that comatose state.

"Ah, its you," Janus mentally smiled. "How long was I out?" With his spear still in his hand, he carefully got off the ground and brushed the dirt off his robe, having endured such an awesome fight with someone he considered to be extremely powerful.

Schrodinger watched him calmly as the god of time looked all over the desolated battlefield, witnessing all the destruction he and Cthulhu caused during their clash of powers, leaving a complete flat land of stone and rocks altogether.

"Oh..." he muttered under his breath after seeing this level of destruction. "I have a lot of explaining to do, don't I?" He chuckled softly while trying to crack a small joke from this outcome, turning towards Schrodinger, who kept glaring at him and frowning in annoyance before shaking his little head in response.

Janus didn't expect to find this place in being reduced to this state, although he probably hadn't noticed it since he was too immersed in his fight. Times like this remind him of his own hubris and stupidity in selfishly placing his own desires before the world around him.

He sighed, understandably regretful at the collateral damage on his part. "I have made a terrible mistake of confronting such beings all on my own. But what's done is done," said the guilt-ridden god, looking away with a question in mind: "Did anyone...die?" Gulping heavily, Janus waited for an answer.

"No," the cat's ears flicked in displeasure. "However, this destruction you did had almost reached our home!" Angrily sparing his own words, the cat growled with gritted fangs, "You're lucky not a single one of my people got themselves killed, or else I would have killed you myself! If not for the fact that we are strictly bound to be traveling companions on some prophecy quest."

Bringing his attention back, he looked down at his feet in silence. The cat was correct; he did bring chaos and destruction to places that had nothing to do with him or his business. His selfishness caused others to suffer and maybe even placed their own lives in danger.

On one hand, he should not be feeling this. Aside from the notion of being able to fall into unconsciousness, Janus did not enjoy being responsible for causing mayhem for other people. Despite everything he had done in the past and all the wrongdoings he committed in the past, the god of beginning and end has learned one thing from his prolonged isolation.

Empathy.

Before his imprisonment, he was just as awful and cruel as his brethren, using mortals for their own benefit and believing them to be nothing more than disposable tools, a lesser race beneath him as if they were just ants. However, after his freedom, he lost all of those negative traits, including positive ones, having to relearn his humanity and understand the concept of free will in itself.

In his victorious battle over Cthulhu, which deep down he still believes to be only temporary, Janus had unlocked a powerful emotion. To understand, feel, and possibly share and respond to another being's experience, he now felt empathy for what he had done.

Or is it guilt he feels? He doesn't know; what matters now is how he should fix this mess he made for himself. "Schrodinger," kneeling down with one leg and then the other, took a bow of humility in his mistakes. "I deeply apologize for the trouble I had caused and the fear I had put your people through. Is there any way to make it up to you?" He said it without much hesitation in his voice.

Hearing altruistic action coming from gods of all places was unheard from the eyes of mortals. Most gods are inherently selfish beings that put their needs before everyone else. It was never expected that Janus alone would ever bow to a lesser form.

Tilting his head, "Your apologizing? God is apologizing to someone like me." He paused. Schrodinger is confused but fascinated by what is occurring here. This is an odd sight; no god would be this generous or open. It was quite unbelievable for him to behold.

"Is this for real?" His blue eyes lit in fascination, and the cat slowly walked to the knee god and asked, "this has to be some kind of joke, or are you genuinely honest about your apology? How am I supposed to believe a deity such as yourself can ever feel guilt or shame? Even speak to us creatures who are supposedly lesser in the eyes of higher beings."

There was doubt on the cat's tongue, wanting to refuse Janus own words because this could not be true. Not in a million years; this has to be some type of trick. Schrodinger cannot comprehend that a god could ever feel bad for doing what humans considered to be bad.

And still, Janus remained steadfast in his request. He held no malice or anger in his gaze but rather patience and understanding for the cat's reaction: "You do not deserve any of this; it was all of my own fault, my selfishness in choosing to challenge him; instead of being smarter, I was a fool in being blinded by craving, knowingly placing the lives of others in jeopardy."

Him? Schrodinger pondered who his companion was referring to, but at the moment, it's probably best to ask questions later. "Humph," turning away from the god, Schrodinger made his thoughts clear. "Well, I can see that you are truly sincere with your words, and if it's within the boundaries of my ability to do so, I will forgive you...for now," he declared coldly in his last sentence.

Relief washed over him as he stood up. "I am thrilled to hear this. Thank you." Janus smiled warmly with closed eyes and then extended his offer: "Seeing how I ruined everything in this beautiful forest, would you like for me to repair this damage I made?" He offered with a slight enthusiasm in his tone.

Still not looking at him, "And how would you do that exactly?" Suddenly he smacked his own registered face. "I forgot you are god," he mumbled to himself in disbelief. "I was wrong for being angry at you from the start," he admitted as he finally turned to face Janus. "Alright then, do whatever you need to do." He agreed to accept God's proposal.

Without delay, Janus held both of his hands together on his spear as he extended it forward with his eyes closed. In a single wish, he twisted reality back to its former self, resulting in the immediate appearance of the forest surrounding them, with all of its trees, wildlife, and vegetation standing in their previous healthy state.

Birds began to chirp and fly in the air, and creatures such as slumbering birds, rabbits, snakes, wolves, and other animalistic or alien beasts were restored. Everything was back to the way it was; Schrodinger would have thought that was all that would be fixed.

Schrodinger smiled at the sight. "I should've remembered that you can alter reality in the get-go," he said with a cheeky grin. "I wanted to say thanks for cleaning everything up," he said without much shame on his part, despite how much he felt cringe at saying something nice for once.

Nodding his head, Janus silently walked away while saying, "Were you returning back to the town or what?" Urging to return home, "didn't you have something there to do before we journeyed to stop the great darkness? Or are you going to stay here like a lost kitten?" He said, causing the cat to follow behind.

"Of course I have not forgotten about that!" Red like saucers, Schrodinger was in a state of embarrassment; how could he forget such a simple task?! "You don't need to remind me of this!" Feeling insulted, he speedily caught up with Janus, and side by side, they continued their way back to Ulthar.

Brief silence came their way as the pair silently trekked in the forest. At the corner of his eyes, the cat was keenly observing him through his own movements, posture, body language, choice of clothing, and even the look on his eyes.

Weirded by this display, "Is there something you want?" Janus asked curiously, wondering why the cat was staring at him for an unknown reason: "I'm not sure what you're thinking, but are you trying to assess or evaluate me?" He asked in an inquiring tone while waiting for an answer.

Despite this, the cat did not reply and simply gave a deadpan stare instead, "Why would I even do that? I was only contemplating the reasons as to who you were fighting for," having remembered the real reason why Janus made that destructive path to begin with.

Widening eyes of surprise, "You want to know?" He asked with high levels of shock in his voice, Was this cat actually interested in such trivial matters? "Because you won't believe me or understand where I'm coming from..."

"Pfft!" Schrodinger let out a mocking chuckle. "Really? Why wouldn't I believe someone like you of all people? After seeing all of this, I doubt you lie in a serious situation," he stated bluntly, causing the god to blink at the statement.

Seeing how the cat already had a high opinion of him, Janus explained, "Fine, it's going to sound crazy, but hear me out." Then he told his companion everything that had transpired, causing the dulled white cat to become more interested in what the Roman god had to say.

With that, Janus began his story.

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