LIMINALITY by Moony1 | World Anvil Manuscripts | World Anvil

Chapter 58

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Night has befallen the empty city of Celephais, leaving Janus alone with his own thoughts as he sat on a nearby wooden bench, his melancholic eyes focusing on the stars and moon that faintly illuminated the darkened sky. It was a sight that would have been beautiful, but it was not enough to quell the storm that raged inside his mind.

How long have you been sitting here? Hours? Minutes? He cannot recall. All he knew was that he was unable to focus on anything but the world around him after everything that had transpired. His own emotions were overwhelming, threatening to consume him if he didn't act, yet he found it difficult to muster up the motivation to even get off the bench.

"I hate you!"

Her words rang through his ears, reverberating through his mind like the ringing of a bell. The pain and betrayal in her voice were unlike anything he had ever heard before, and it cut him deep inside. He could still feel the sting within his heart that continues to throb even now.

Janus hung his head down in shame, closing his eyes in an attempt to shut out the world around him. There was no point in thinking about it anymore. She was clearly blaming him for what happened to the people they cared most about.

It wasn't her fault; however, he knows this much. In fact, this is his own fault. "Damn it!" Clenching his fists tightly, he cursed himself in anger, frustration, and grief. He had failed again, not just for himself but for those he loved and cared about.

He always thinks of his friends, but what about others who are important to them? How idiotic he is to focus on just them but not their family and lovers. Yet, what did he do in return? Nothing but continue to bring them more pain and suffering from his presence.

"Disappear from my life!"

Tears streamed down Janus cheeks. His heart grows more aching with the passing of each moment. It's funny. This is what he wanted all along. To be forgotten, to fade into nothingness, and to die in obscurity by someone else. And now this is the price to pay for associating with these lower life forms.

Regret washes over him, leaving him feeling numb and hollow inside. His chest ached with every breath, the weight of guilt pressing heavily against his shoulders from having gotten close to them. He shouldn't have learned about humanity, its flaws, and wonders alike.

But it was too late for him to back down now. He had already invested so much time and energy into them that there was no turning back. Regardless of how much he wants to return to where he was, being the expressionless primordial god, part of him still appreciates the experiences he had with them.

"May I sit with you?" Schrodinger suddenly asked, "Janus?" He waited for his approval, seeing him silently nod with hesitation in response. Taking this as a signal, Schrodinger took a seat on the bench while focusing on the starry sky above. "You know she still cares for the both of us, right?"

Silence filled the air around them as Schrodinger quietly watched Janus shake his head in denial of such an accusation: "I don't know. Part of me does, but the other is still unsure of what she truly thinks of me at this point. Am I just an obstacle or someone she despises for being useless towards those she cares most about? I mean, why should she bother wasting time on me?"

Chuckle, in response to his reply, "because she loves you?" The cat added in, causing Janus to look at him with confusion in his eyes and say, "Give her a chance, Janus. Just how she gave you a chance when you met her in the beginning," this comment caused him to fall silent for a few seconds, his eyes cast downward in uncertainty.

"I guess you are right," he sighed, feeling more tired than usual. "But what she said to me, it hurts to think about," Janus finally admitted while trying to compose himself in front of his feline companion. He needed some space to clear his thoughts. "I thought words didn't hold much merit behind them, but I was wrong." Janus felt weak, vulnerable, and weak. "It turns out they do hurt," Janus sighed heavily as he sat down onto the ground, resting his forehead in the palms of both hands.

Schrodinger smiled, caressing his soft head onto the god's shoulder. "I'm your friend, Janus. "It has always been since we met at first," he said softly. "Don't just go run off and hide yourself, okay?" He felt Janus body stiffen slightly, indicating that he heard him loud and clear.

Retreating himself back to his spot, Schrodinger had an idea of how to continue their mission of ridding the Great Darkness itself. "I know a place where we can seek all the answers that we need to stop the Dreamlands from ever going to another Kalpa again," the cat stated with confidence in his voice, causing Janus to raise his eyebrow in question about what he is referring to, "the Tower of Time."

Composing his back, he straightened himself with a look of confusion. "And why didn't we do that in the beginning?" Janus asks in a sarcastically tone, causing Schrodinger to nervously laugh at a reasonable question they should've done all the way back when they were heading to Celephais.

"Ah oh," scratching the back of his neck, Schrodinger felt a level of stupidity in what he was about to say next. "To be honest, it slipped from my mind," he answered with a slight embarrassment evident in his voice, "sorry for that. It must be my age getting on me." He muttered quietly underneath his breath while keeping his head low to avoid making any further eye contact.

"Okay, sure." Leaning back with his stretched elbows touching the park bench behind him, Janus still feels reluctant about whether this is a good idea after their entire mission was comprised. "And what are we supposed to find there?" He asks, "I assume it's information regarding where we are and how we can destroy that damn octopus."

Nodding his head, Schrodinger was confident in this endeavor. "Yes," he replied, "the Tower of Time is essentially a library in a way that holds all the records of every past and future event," explaining everything from the ground up. "It has been centuries since I last visited there," he continued. "I'd reckon it has changed ever since I last saw it."

Janus hummed in understanding, looking down at his own two feet with conflicting decisions about this: "What do you suggest we do?" He asked as he waited for an answer from the cat, "Because I'm itching to have my revenge on Cthulhu," mentioning that the name had caused Schrodinger to raise a brow or two.

"Cthulhu? That's his name?" So many things are happening at once, and bits of pieces are beginning to fade away within the back of his mind. "Anyway," quickly composing himself to prevent any further distractions, he decided to ask Janus a very important question that required an honest answer: "Are you in or not?" A simple question but a difficult answer.

Janus let out a sigh, rubbing his temple from all this mental stress he was getting. He wasn't sure what to do anymore. There was no telling what could happen, nor is there any point in even continuing this destiny they have after their main target turns out to be dead.

However, is he going to stay here and continue sulking like a pathetic little kid who was rejected by the one he loves the most, or is he willing to face his fear and finish what he started by achieving his ultimate desire to complete the purpose he was given?

He can feel the entire world closing in around him—the air becoming thinner and his throat getting tighter with each passing moment. His chest aches with a dull pain, and his stomach is knotted like a pretzel. Janus has to give an answer now, or ever.

Because the sooner he waits, the faster this world will be destroyed. And there is no guarantee that everyone, including Schrodinger, will be alive to see the tale. "I'm going to stop him," declaring his determination, Janus stands from his seat with a confident stride. "He wasn't only hurting people but also my very existence itself," his fists then clenched from his declaration, "so as the god of time, it's my job to destroy this worthless existence altogether!" He yells as loud as possible for everyone to hear, causing Schrodinger to smile at this newfound confidence that Janus is showing.

"Good," he said, jumping off the bench. "I thought we lost you again." The feline expresses relief to see his friend and comrade finally recovering from their downfall. "Now we need to get Saomi back on her feet; it won't take long to—"

Approaching footsteps are heard walking in the distance, interrupting the feline before he could continue speaking as they turned around to see a different Saomi, one who isn't filled with hope and compassion but hatred of pure vengeance instead.

She slightly looked different; dark circles surrounded her eyes with bloodshot iris. Hair strands were sticking out messily, as if she had been hit by a truck. Her fingers were permanently stained with blood, and her palms remain soaked in them, all while not showing a smile on her lips from seeing them.

If it weren't for her clothes and katana altogether, they would have thought that it was her sister of some kind, or probably something strange. But the two know that this is her, the well-nurtured girl they knew all along. Although the sight itself still unnerved them regardless,.

"Saomi?" Janus carefully called out to her, making sure he had the right person. "Are you fine now?" What else is there to say? He was worried, concerned, and deeply scared about having to see her like this. She was a mere shell of her former self. With empty eyes and a soulless expression, she appeared as if she had just seen a ghost.

"I'm feeling better," her uncaring voice echoed in the area, barely containing a hint of emotion behind her words. "The tower of time is where we are heading, correct?" She asked bluntly, not caring much of the answers, "correct?" The repeated sentences were much louder this time, leaving no room for questioning.

"Yeah, I can teleport us all there," Schrodinger said without much hesitation, understanding what she was planning. "Listen, Saomi, I know what you are going through, but with these emotions boiling inside of you, do you think your father would—"

One swift motion of her blade landed right next to him, faster than he could perceive. "Shut up," the two words were said with such malice and venom in them that it could kill a person. "Don't you ever say his name," her grip tightening against her weapon.

Gulping in fear, Schrodinger nodded his head at this sudden change of pace. "Sure," he managed to muster out in sheer terror. Noticing that it might be best not to push her buttons even further, he didn't dare speak another word.

Adjusting herself with her sword, she turned to Janus, her dulled, bloodshot eyes meeting with his nervous ones. They stood in silence for a brief moment before she broke it, asking him, "What are you looking at?" Saomi coldly asked, clearly annoyed by this encounter.

Not wanting to provoke her, Janus chose to keep quiet. Instead of responding to her question, he merely glanced at the floor and awkwardly shifted in place, unsure of what to say until the right words came to mind: "I'm sorry for everything." soft, gentle, and genuine, Janus apologized, knowing how much pain and suffering the last few moments had caused her.

"Tch," clicking her tongue, she took a step backward. "Don't pretend that I forgive you because I am here," the young woman growled dangerously. There was no need for her to elaborate any further on why she did. He already understood enough by now. "Get us to that place and let's kill that bastard," she demanded harshly.

Her comment prompted Schrodinger to glance over at Janus, silently pleading with his eyes as if he wanted to say, 'Please make sure she doesn't murder me', an action that made the deity pity him a little bit more than usual. He wasn't sure if this was a good idea to bring her to the tower of time yet; he had already lost her father figure and friend to her rage, and he couldn't afford to lose another.

"Go on," Janus said to the cat, "teleport us there."

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